Kites and Wiffleball - What else can bring Joy on a blustery day?

Certain experiences are important in a growing boys life. Playing in sprinklers, riding bikes, getting dirty, climbing trees are just three. I think back to Tom and Huck fishing with a cane pole or my cousin Scott and I climbing my grandparent's trees especially the one in the front yard that we ascended all the way to the top one day and were both almost too frightened to come back down!

Kite flying. Yes, we don't see this much anymore. Little boys taking to the skies with their beloved kite to master the winds above them and tame that triangular shaped piece of flimsy plastic with quite the thin string. Spencer and I made our journey to the Bear Branch Elementary field where the wind swirled on this rare occasion in Kingwood. It doesn't happen often so we took advantage.

This B-1 Stealth Bomber shaped kite was about to make its debut in the skies over the Liveable Forest. I gave the string to Spinner and instructed him to run when tossed the "plane" up into the air. It didn't take much. Up it went. The wind howled. The sand flew behind the rocketing feet of my six year old as he giggled and bestowed his successful first flight. A gust of wind followed sending the bomber into a loop and tumbling to its initial crash into the turf. As we recovered our craft, up to the sky it went with another lift into the air. This time I was at the helm and the string was let out at a lightening pace. Almost like afterburners, it flapped violently way up in the sky almost out of sight it seemed. I gave Spencer the string holder to navigate. He held on tight as it darted back and forth in the blustery gales above the pine trees.

He laughed. I smiled. I took a couple of pictures and a quick video. Great memory. He had a blast. After about 30 minutes of piolting our flying $3.99 kite from the Easter Bunny, we went on to our next event, his soccer game at the Y.

Later that evening, Chandler has invited over a few of his friends, ten of them, for his belated 16th birthday get together. My highlight of the evening came when they strolled outside to the court facing our home. Following the National Anthem and the proverbial first pitch, Wiffleball was underway. I was transported to 10 years ago playing baseball with a much younger Chandler in that same court. I watched as these teenage boys played like they were 6, 8 or 10 years old again. They pitched, hit, ran, taunted, and were little boys again. I took some more pics and a quick video as well.

What can I say? I love being a dad. I truly enjoy watching my sons have fun and enjoy life, their friends, hearing them laugh, and making the most out of this chapter in our lives. It is a time I hope to never forget and when I get down, all I have to do is look at these pictures or watch these videos. God brings me back to place of joy.


My grace is sufficient for you...One Day At A Time!

Bluebonnets, Memories...Old and New

When God created bluebonnets, He had to be thinking of Texas. Everything is bigger in Texas as they say. The bluebonnet? The biggest beauty of wildflowers in my book.

The bluebonnets are not only the Texas state flower, but in this family, a tradition. It might not be a yearly addition in the Cahill Crew, but we try to make it a special run as often as possible. It has been a few years. The last time we motored up 290 toward Hempstead and Brenham was three years ago.

Yes...another first. The concern, to be completely honest, mounted in my mind for my oldest. A lot of memories in the head from past trips not only three years ago, but many others throughout the years. Both boys really wanted to take a drive to a field of these beautiful wild flowers, take Savannah (Chandler's very sweet girlfriend) and shoot some lasting pictures. I obliged of course.

Back up a second though. Saturday evening. Bed time. Putting the little guy to bed, I finished reading to him and Spencer wanted to talk about the bluebonnets. My mouth literally fell open over the next few moments.

"Daddy, do you remember when we went to the bluebonnets?" Spencer asked.

"Uhh...sure." I said, not knowing that he actually remembered three years prior when he was a sprite 3 years old.

"We all went, daddy. You, me, Chandler and mommy." He said.

I nodded and said, "Yes, buddy. I remember that day. Do you remember that day too?"

"Uh huh. That was a great day. We all had a lot of fun."

"Yes. We did. That is a great memory, buddy."

And then out of nowhere came this...

"Is mommy ever coming home?" Spencer asked. Yes. You read that correctly.

It has been two and a half years. My mouth fell open. My heart sank to my shoes. I did the best I could do as this took me by total surprise.

"Buddy, mommy isn't coming home. She has a new home with a new person. It is you and me and Chandler now. You still get to see mommy and talk to her, but she is not coming home. She still loves you, buddy."

The lip quivered. The tears ran. He reached up for me. I grabbed him and he wept for 5 solid minutes in my arms. I just held the little guy. I told him that I loved him and that I was here for him and that his brother was here as well. I thought about cancelling the trip to the bluebonnets that was slated for the next day after church. I was angry. I was hurt. Emotions flooded my mind, my heart, my soul...all for this little innocent 6 year old with a memory. More than one memory. Good memories. Scary memories. Emotion filled memories.

Where to go from here?

After he settled down, I prayed over him God's blessing and to touch his heart and bring him joy and happiness. He asked if we could pray for mommy. I told him we could and we prayed for God to bless her as well. I asked him if he still wanted to go after church the next day and he said that he really did, but wanted to bring some of his buddies (stuffed animals). I told him that that would be great and that they would probably love the bluebonnets too!

I kissed him on his forehead, turned out the light, and walked out of the his room.

After church the next day, we picked up Savannah and journeyed west out 290 to find a field of bluebonnets. We didn't even have to get to Hempstead before we came upon one the largest fields of bluebonnets I have ever seen. We pulled over and scampered through these beautiful wild flowers. As I snapped pictures of the boys, of Chandler and Savannah, and of Spencer and his "buddies", I thought how much this memory would etch into their minds as well. We laughed. We ran. We basked in God's glorious creation.

I stopped and looked out over the field, thought back, fought back a tear and then looked at the boys. My two sons. Happy. Chandler with his girlfriend being silly running through the bluebonnets hand in hand...giggling. Spencer laying down in the flowers looking up at the sky with his Hot Wheels sunglasses and "buddies". A new memory. Another new beginning. This is good.

Abandonment is brutal. It has such a lasting effect. The research out there states that most kids will be impacted for the rest of their lives even if the abandonment happened when they were quite young as in Spencer's case. Saturday night's question and breakdown proved that to me even more as he summoned up a memory from three years ago. Who would have ever guessed he would remember something from when he was three? Truly amazing. That day obviously had a large impact on him and served as a positive memory for him.

We all built new memories that day. All of them positive. All lasting. All fun. All with smiles. The lasting impact of abandonment and divorce might be scarring, but who says we can't build great lasting positive memories that can hopefully overshadow some of that pain? God is all about joy. He is all about fullness. And as my good friend Chad so famously states, "God is bigger." He is, Chad.

Bigger field of wildflowers. Bigger smiles that day. Bigger laughs. New Bigger Memories. God is Bigger.



My grace is sufficient for you...One Day At A Time!

The Wisdom of Ferris Bueller

Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. Ferris' words have more than a ring of truth to them. I feel as if I blinked or forgot to "look around once in a while". A few for instances:

Dad

Dad playing a number game with Spencer last weekend

My father turns 71 at the end of the month. I still remember him playing catch with me as a little boy. How my sister and I ran into his arms as my sister and I yelled "DADDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!" when he would walk in from work at night. I still have strong memories of crawling in bed on Sunday mornings with my sis and he would read the funnies to us. I don't remember the funnies. I remember him reading to us. I now know as a dad that he looked forward to that more than we probably did. I never viewed him as "young" in those days. He was dad. And yes, in my eyes, he was...ahem...old. Now here I sit typing this out on my computer and am older than he was when he read the funnies to Vickie and I while my mom smiled in the doorway with her warm cup of joe. I am glad I looked around and didn't miss that one. Yes, dad will be 71, but his heart is still that of the daddy when we played catch, jumped into his arms and listened to his baritone voice read Snoopy to us...morning breath and all. All that mattered was that he made those times special. Thanks, dad.

Chandler

Chandler driving dad's Denali on Sunday

Warp speed has entered the Cahill household. Now coming in for a crash landing (I use that language loosely of course and pray for that not to be in the literal sense) ...Chandler's 16th birthday on March 27th. Really? Wait. No. This has to be wrong. I can honestly say that this must be some sort of mix up as I could have sworn I just experienced seeing him hit a home run in Tee Ball, twirl a Bo Staff in Tae Kwon Do, draw a masterpiece in Art at school which rests on the fridge held up by a magnet that he made in kindergarten, and numerous other acts that have carved themselves into my memory as he has grown. He really does turn 16. He received his permit last week and drives every moment the chance arises. Chandler grows each day and I don't believe I could be more proud. I have never seen such a good big brother, son, friend, etc. He has a strong moral compass, a heart for God, and a passion for drums. I look forward to more "looks" from the philosophy of Ferris.

Spencer

Spencer at Deerbrook Mall this week

Still so young. What future lies in front of him? What will he like? What will be his passion? Where will his heart carry him? I have already blinked as I still cannot believe he is already in Kindergarten and in October will turn 7 years old. That is only two years younger than Chandler, 9, when he was born! Unbelievable. Pretending is the order of the day now and it brings all sorts of memories with it as well. The creativity of a little boy. Is there anything else like it? I think not. This week we have been cowboys, teachers, and race car drivers. In the past, cars have blown up, races won, lost, bad guys arrested and brought in for questioning, and the list goes on and on. The list will continue to grow as well. I still remember Chandler at this age. Thanks, Ferris. The more "looking around" at this age the better.

I believe the earth turns quicker on its axis nowadays. It must. These days move too quickly. Where is the sloooowww down button (insert the sound of an album played on 16 rpm here)?

For now, I soak up as many memories as possible. Take as many pictures as I can. Shoot as much video as I have room on a hard drive. Looking back at all of these memories will bring joy, smiles and dreams coming true.

When the credits roll to the end, I just hope Ferris doesn't ask why I am still here and I need to go home now. 

My grace is sufficient for you...One Day At A Time!

BBQ, a Cute Couple, Bumper Cars, a Big Leap Forward

The traffic mounted as we drove closer to Reliant Stadium where outside between the hulking stadium and the old classic Astrodome lay the 2012 BBQ Cookoff and Carnival. Once we found a place to park and purchased Spencer a jacket as the temperature dropped what seemed like 10 degrees since we had left Kingwood, we strolled down the sidewalk to our destination. Free BBQ (thanks to a really nice company that I do business with), carnival rides and good ol' fashioned fun stood right in front of us. Chandler, Savannah, Spencer and myself walked through what seemed like a stepped on ant hill of people from all walks of like doing their best to dress up like cowboys and cowgirls. As we approached the BBQ area, the intense smell of smokin' cookers spread through the air like a small mushroom cloud. We made our way through the maze of massive tents from corporations to professional chefs to finally find the one we were looking for, The Willis Group. Inside lay a spread of mouthwatering brisket, chicken, ribs so tender they fell off the bone and scrumptios sausage. All four of us ate and relaxed from our sizable walk from the jeep. I took in the smells and a load of memories flooded my mind as I thought back to the countless Rodeos I had attended with my family as a child through my teenage years when The Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo was held in the Astrodome and Astrohall. Great memories. The tradition now continues with the next generation of Cahill's, so it is on to the Carnival!

We purchased out tickets for the rides and upon a unanimous vote, took off for the everpopular Bumper Cars. Chandler and Savannah hopped into the same car...quite cute as you can imagine. Spencer was beside himself with excitement. We had just watched his favorite show last week, Top Gear on the BBC America, and there were bumper cars in the episode. He wanted to get in one of these ever since we watched the show. Now, his chance arrived.

We jumped in and I pulled down the safety bar over us. Spencer grinned from ear to ear as the announcer went through his schpeel probably for the 107th time that day. When he finished, we took off! I immediately scoped out Chandler and Savannah and sped toward them while Specner laughed and screamed with glee. We hit and recieved hits from numerous bumper cars and then I noticed Spinner reaching for the wheel. In all of the excitement, he wanted to drive! Why not? So, we were now being piloted by a six year old with an amazing fascination for cars. In his complete elation, he zoned in on anything that was in front of him that he could hit. I kept my foot on the accelerator at all times and never took it off. We nailed Chandler and Savannah countless times and vice versa all of us laughing non-stop.  Following this experience, I took a pic this picture of him. He demanded that he be outside of the bumper car for the picture.

We had a ball and it was the beginning a great memory.

From the bumper cars we waltzed over to the massive ferris wheel where we all got into the same booth that took us to heights were we could see all over the city. The downtown skyline stood in pride, the sadness of the field where Astroworld used to stand, the incredible standard of the Medical Center, and a gorgeous Texas sunset. The setting was a picture of symbolism for me. The sun had set on a life that I had thought once would be to now what it is and can be. Little did I know that a big step for a little boy was just moments away.

Following the beautiful ride on the ferris wheel, we strolled through the crowd for a funnel cake (after all, what is a carnival without a funnel cake?!) and a ride on a slide in potato sacks. We went through fun houses, haunted houses, watched a bunch of guys try to win prizes in the games and eventually came upon a massive slide and the kiddie bumper cars (a smaller version of what our first choice of the night had been). The slide, one the largest I have ever seen, reminded me of the one in the beginning credits of a show called the Banana Splits. Steep? Understatement. Spencer begged to go on it. Why not?! Not only did he want to ride this extremely larger than life slide, he wanted to do it alone with me on the slide next to him. What a huge step! I took a video of this on my phone. He laughed and screamed and smiled and screamed and laughed and smiled. I was elated for him. I slid behind him videoing and I couldn't help getting emotional. I was moved. Chandler was surprised. I was so excited for him. He blew my mind even more when he wanted to ride on the kiddie bumper cars alone! This is a leap for my boy. This almost brought me to tears as I watched him drive, be competitive, laugh, get intense, squeel for joy. He was having the time of his life. I sat back and enjoyed watching both of my boys as Chandler and Savannah had fun together as a budding young high school couple and Spencer experienced a handful of firsts in his life.

Spencer's attachment issues dwindled, didn't disappear, a bit as he rode a slide alone and jumped in a bumper car to drive alone. I rejoiced. I thanked the Lord for this. He gave Spencer strength through excitement. What a wonderful aide in coping for a little guy. Speechless again.

What a great day. We drove home. Now it was my turn. I smiled from ear to ear. My boys had a ball. Chandler made some great memories with his girlfriend as well as his brother and myself. Spencer gained a well-needed taste of independence. I soaked in yet another incredible memory with the two most incredible sons a dad could ask for in this life. Enjoy the video...yes...you will smile especially if you know our story.

My grace is sufficient for you...One Day At A Time!

Rainy Days and Hot Wheel Tracks



The storm rolled in around 3:00 a.m. when my little one staggered in my room quite frightened from the loud thunder clap. I had heard the sound and knew it would only be a matter of moments when the knob of my bedroom door would be turned and the sound of whimpering would follow along with the pitter patter of feet.

"Daddy, I'm scared."

"It's okay, buddy. I'm here. Do you want to sleep in here with daddy?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Crawl in..."

Spencer climbs in my king size sleigh bed and pulls the covers up all the way to his neck as he clutches his wooby and gets so close to me that I feel like I am about to fall out of this large bed.

The rain came. The skies opened up and I started to wonder if an ark construction was in the plans for the Houston area. Spencer fell asleep quickly. I lie awake listening to the rain hit the roof and roll off into the yard as the grass sucked up the well needed replenishing.

The parallels struck me so evidently. For two years, the storms have raged. At times, I have felt like drowning in the pain could be the only lot left in life. I watch and listen to my boys struggle at times, but as time moves forward, a little rain brings nourishment. We stretch forward like a blade of grass yearning for fresh water. As it hits us, we take it in, close our eyes and await the next hit of refreshment.

Not only do these rainy days have the potential to bring us this well-needed hit of  rejuvenation, but they can also be a needed change of plans. I had wanted to get on my bike and put in some well-needed miles. Instead, we ended up building a Hot Wheels track in the family room and tested numerous cars to see which one(s) worked best with the two power boosters. This started our day off with some great time together. Sure, I missed a workout, but I gained a memory. The rain is good not only for the ground, grass, trees, plants, etc. It brought about a quick change of plans as simple as a Hot Wheel track.

The journey is one day at a time. It needs simplicity...not complexity. Isn't God wonderful Who brings in the weather to usher in simplicity in our lives and make the important a reality.

I still worked out later. I took the boys to the gym and lifted with Chandler while Spencer made some new friends in the childcare area. The teachers fell in love with him immediately. My boys have that effect on people. They are lovable because He is loving toward us. In the midst of storms, He has refreshed us with His grace and mercy. The journey continues.


My grace is sufficient for you...One Day At A Time!